So how should I describe my mother now when people ask what’s “wrong” with her? Asperger’s seemed a good fit, and a convenient shortcut that felt true. “On the autistic spectrum” invites more questions than answers, which may be necessary in a bigger picture, but often the quicker moniker is only necessary in a moment where she’s performed a behavior that’s gone, umm, against the tide and requires a short explanation. But at the same time I don’t want to be accused of aligning with a eugenicist!!! Words can be so freeing, and equally limiting.